Laugh at Carlscum thread

[stui magpie]

[quote="Mr Miyagi"]We broke Carlton

[Geek]

Years of pain for burnt draft capital examples like pick 3 (Dow), 5 (SPS) and 10 (Obrien) are the tip of the iceberg.

I don't think that's really fair. You know for every Blaine Boekhurst they've brought in with their first pick, they've brought in a Josh Bootsma too.... actually... strike that

At least they've recognised that having struggled to pick top end talent (outside of Dow and Menzel of course) and have instead traded those early picks for established talent like Jacksh, Wiley, Plowman and McGovern. I suppose that whatsisname from Melbourne they got with pick 10 in '09 is outside the statute of limitations now so that helps the average a bit too.

Free agency has worked well for them. They did get the best of Daisy Thomas after all. And who could have guessed that Williams would get injured after not providing a fraction of the value his pay cheque would suggest. May as well put Jack Martin in that boat too.

Well... I guess maybe they're right. Maybe it's all going to have to be left to Marchbank, Palmer, Pickett, Newnes and Fogarty.

I know that sometimes we ask just what it was that Hine and co was thinking but Carlton, especially under SOS (they should make him recruiter of the century) really are next level bad.

Bring back Kerridge and Lamb, I say.

[Geek]

^ To put that into the context of the game, the Swans had 6 players who had multiple shots at goal and, between those 6, a total of 14 shots at goal - they kicked goals with 10 of those 14 shots. In total, the Swans had just 20 shots at goal but goaled with 11 of them, whereas Carlton goaled with just 6 of their 22.

Against us last week, Carlton had 5 players with multiple shots at goal. Those 5 players managed 7 goals from 18 shots. Curnow and McKay also had 10 shots between them in that game - but they managed to kick 5 of those 10 (compared with just 1 from their 10 last night). Of course, Mihocek and Johnson kicking 6 goals from their combined 6 shots in the same game (and 4 other 'pies who nailed each of their sole shots at goal - so that those 6 players between them went 10 from 10) tells you a fair bit about why Carlton keeps losing.

You forgot all the out-on-the-fulls.

And some of them were brilliant

It's a good time to be a pies fan. Essendon are struggling to get back to so-so. Richmond are in disarray and looking for a new coach. Carlton will be looking for a new coach and are heading south at a great rate of knots. And our mob are a game clear in first, about to play a WAFL side.

I know this can't last, hey. So I'm enjoying every last drop I can get of it.

[23 YIPPEE!!!]

I like Carlton blues.

But i just prefer Collingwood

[Pies4shaw]

You forgot all the out-on-the-fulls.

And some of them were brilliant

It's a good time to be a pies fan. Essendon are struggling to get back to so-so. Richmond are in disarray and looking for a new coach. Carlton will be looking for a new coach and are heading south at a great rate of knots. And our mob are a game clear in first, about to play a WAFL side.

I know this can't last, hey. So I'm enjoying every last drop I can get of it.

Not that it matters greatly in the scheme of things but I think the "shots at goal" stat includes non-scoring misses - so, eg, outs on the full and Curnow kicking into the man on the mark before Motlop cleaned up the mess. Thus, McKay is recorded as having 5 "shots at goal" against Sydney, even though he scored 0.3 and Curnow is recorded as having 5 shots at goal for 1.3.

[Pies4shaw]

Speaking of laughing at the Blues, I just read that McKay is contracted to them until the end of 2030. Seriously. The Blues have McKay contracted to play until he's 32. This is a player who has had 41 shots at goal in 2023 for 14 goals (for context, Mihocek has had 40 shots on goal for 28 goals) and is ranked 299th (I kid you not) in the AFL in 2023 for goal accuracy. Mind you, he is well ahead of Cripps, who is on 7.7% - and 397th.

[swoop42]

.....

[Geek]

The Luke Sayers thread over there is gold. About this time last year, things were going along swimmingly. Much like Victorians with Dan after the bushfires, there's talk about how other places could do with someone like el presidente at the helm.

Then, "nek minnit" as I believe the youth still like to say on occasion, it all went a bit "lockdown". The next 11 pages detail the slow keeling over of the Good Ship Caaarton to the point where they are again calling for root and branch upheaval.

And Voss? Ooh boy. They aren't too happy with him. It's real Buckley circa 2016 level angst over there at the moment only with the backdrop of the 7(!!!) other failed coaches since Parkin took off in 2000.

"8 years into a failed rebuild". "If we sack him now we go back to where we were with Teague". "If we don't sack him he'll ruin another entire generation of players" and so on. Its full on.

Yuh... She's a fierce mistress, is Lady Karma and she doesn't miss a thing. Reckon she might charge interest too. She's been working hard on expurgating Carlton's sins and it is wise for us to witness, acknowledge and appreciate her work, lest she start giving us the hairy eyebrow.

[WhyPhilWhy?]

Gee - the Club punished over brown paper bag payments has the ex-CEO of the now disgraced PWC as its President.

You lie down with dogs...

[What'sinaname]

If you can move this thread to General Discussion, why not move the Rd 12 - Other games here too?

[WhyPhilWhy?]

Because we have a 264 page tradition of laughing at Carlton that has lasted over a decade. Carlton is our one exception to the Rules

[Jezza]

Another week, another Carlton loss

[Magpietothemax]

Another week, another Carlton loss

How is a team with two Coleman medallists in the forward line so incapable of kicking goals?

[Jezza]

Another week, another Carlton loss

How is a team with two Coleman medallists in the forward line so incapable of kicking goals?

Carlton's last month for 'points for':

44 points vs Melbourne
51 points vs Sydney
57 points vs Collingwood
59 points vs Western Bulldogs

[Jezza]

TankingCarlton...

Lol

Would love to know what Patrick Cripps was looking so forward to tonight.

Same old boring garbage
Can’t score
Tackling was extremely weak
It isn’t going to get any better soon - the rot has set it and it’s not going anywhere until something changes significantly

It is my bday tomorrow and I made the decision to not watch.

Good decision. These cauliflower don’t deserve us.

Anyone else watching the entire game with a resting heart rate? It's all a bit meh...I'd like to care - but it's too much effort.

This mob couldn’t score in a brothel

Bereft of confidence, skill, creativity- it’s a @#$%&! train wreck.

I've never seen a team look so out of the game when only 2-4 goals down.

That's like anyone else being 6-8 goals down.

39 inside 50 lowest this year
Lowest score under Voss

It’s like the Bolton days when we struggled to kick goals

However, this is eight years into a rebuild

Have no idea what they were practicing over the pre season

Probably focused on pin point passes while remaining stagnant

God we are boring to watch. Has taken the fun out of footy.

Zero time in front trailed the whole game.
Getting harder and harder to watch

Effort is redundant when there’s no skill, poise or class.

D graders being given charity with a pity season in the AFL with the real professionals

As the great Bruce Mcavaneyy says. Carlton look like a team that is happy to lose by 20 (or was it 30?)

The most disappointing season of the last 20 as we were ready to go and expecting so much better. Such a letdown. At least other years we knew we were crap or not quite ready. Playing the worst brand of footy imaginable, can't kick a goal and seemingly don't care where the ball goes when we have it. Thought we were good for top 4 to 6 this year. Instead we will be 14th by the ending of the weekend with 5 successive losses.

How far backwards can one side go.

we don't play with any purpose. we don't cover the ground. we don't look for space, but most damning we look lost and confused. there's a big disconnect with the messages from the coaching group to the players.

list management and development is deplorable too.

imagine locking up core players of a bottom 6 team for the next 6-7-8 seasons. haha

I deleted all my footy apps
I unfollowed everyone that has anything to do with CFC on social
I just cancelled the sports package on Foxtel
I redirected my kayo package to a binge package
I’m done!

I hope someone pulls up footage of Docherty's "effort" during the week. Disgusting putrid jogging once they have the footy. Either we drop him or just accept that is the tone and continue to get rolled.

The gameplan is either archaic
OR
the players haven't bought in and confused/not following instruction
OR
players have checked out as they've heard a rumour that Voss' position is untenable and will be sacked after we lose to Essenson

If this list were playing to their full potential, we would be in the 8...pure and f%^& simple

There is omething fundamentally wrong in the locker room

I can't help but think it all goes back to leg speed...while we built for contest the game shifted and its about speed and covering a lot of ground quickly - we have so few players who can do that and none of our best ones.